Kind of cool
Kind of captured a feeling, though I was waiting for something more, or perhaps just a change in any aspect of the piece. Perhaps just changing the register, and playing the same notes an octave lower or higher would do the trick. Or even a whole other layer to the piece, like a woodwind melody. There are infinite possibilities in music, and I think you'd find greater enjoyment in writing your music if you tried more stuff. Perhaps something you'd never think of doing, just to see what happens. Also, the repetitive bass octaves could be mixed down a bit. They rather muddy the track.
Very good material, though. Keep writing. :-)